I started dating my boyfriend as a senior in high school. At first we thought it was just for fun and temporary, even though we did love each other. We thought we would be breaking up at the end of the summer to attend different colleges. During the summer after graduation I became very close friends with my boyfriend's best friend. Eventually I found that we had a ton in common and over the summer we discovered we had feelings for each other. I let myself have feelings for him since I thought that my boyfriend and I would be breaking up soon anyway.

Well when the end of the summer came, my boyfriend told me that he couldn't break up with me and he wanted us to stay together, even though we would be at different colleges. Since I actually did love my boyfriend I decided to try it. Well, I've now finished two years of college and even though we were across the state, we are still together, almost three years now. The problem is that my connection and my feelings for his friend have never died. His friend has told me his feelings have never gone away either. My boyfriend's friend over the past two years has become my own best friend, and I feel that I am definitely falling in love with him, even though I still am in love with my own boyfriend. My boyfriend knows that his friend loves me, but he does not know that in my heart I have the same feelings too. I love both of these men equally, and both of them treat me like a queen. I don't know what to do or how I will ever know which one is the right one for me. My boyfriend is very intelligent, he is motivated, mature and he takes great care of me, and we have very good physical chemistry. The problem is that he has trouble communicating and sometimes I find it hard to tell him exactly how I feel.
His friend, on the other hand, I can and have said everything to. He knows even the deepest secrets that I have. I don't know if we have physical chemistry though because I never wanted to actually voluntarily cheat on my boyfriend. I am so stuck. Please help. Thank you.

Candy

Dear Candy,

The first thing you should know is that you can never love two men at the same time and equally!
You should be very honest with yourself before being honest with anybody else, try and figure things out in your mind, and see where your heart finds comfort and love more.
But you have to be fair to the guys as well, your boyfriend is actually a victim in this whole situation, because he loves you and has no clue that you are ‘cheating’ on him, and his friend isn’t helping in solving the problem!
It is up to you to decide, your old boyfriend, or the new one! And remember, the most important thing is to be fair.